Sacrificial, Unconditional, Incarnational: A Biblical View of Marriage

Word from the Center
Written By LCRL Staff

It’s April. This month, help support our efforts to contend for the freedom to proclaim the faith.


I recently began a wedding sermon addressing the couple, “Your marriage is going to be tough! It’s going to be filled with conflict and suffering and sorrow and pain. And, if you do it right, you’ll eventually get to watch each other get old, have more pain, carry more grief and watch each other move toward death.”

Their eyes got as big as saucers, and their huge smiles started to waver. I paused for a bit with a very serious look on my face, because it is all, sadly, true. I then continued, “However, you’re about to enter one of the most beautiful experiences you can ever have on earth. You’ll have glimpses of heaven that most will never see. You’ll delight in the love of Jesus overflowing to you from your spouse. When you fall, you’ll have each other to speak words of forgiveness and renewal. Your joy will grow and overflow to everyone. And I can say this with certainty.”

Is there such a thing as a perfect marriage? Absolutely! The marriage between Jesus and His Bride, the church. At least it is perfect from the side of the husband. And it is also perfect in that He forgives the faults of His Bride to make her perfect too. That is what St. Paul is talking about in Ephesians 5:32: “This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.”

Jesus has claimed all Christians collectively as His beloved Bride. He has loved us with perfect love that fulfills the mandate of Ephesians 5:31. That verse is the seminal word on marriage in Scripture and describes the perfect marriage between Adam and Eve in Eden prior to the fall. In Genesis 2:24, the Lord said of this newly created union, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” Jesus reinforced this as the perfect way for marriage in Matthew 19:5 (see also Mark 10:7). To emphasize its importance, all three persons of the Trinity proclaim this perfect pattern for marriage: The Father established it at creation. The Son reaffirmed it during His incarnation. The Holy Spirit gave it to St. Paul by inspiration. Such a teaching must be important and powerful. Indeed, it is.

The perfect love described in this key passage is sacrificial, unconditional and incarnational. To “leave his father and his mother” requires great sacrifice of selfish desire. To “hold fast to his wife” requires a husband to make an unconditional choice to never break the commitment of love. To “become one flesh” requires a union of the flesh that is uniquely incarnational and possible between one man and one woman.

We look to Jesus, the perfect husband, as the illustration of such love. Jesus showed perfect sacrificial love for us as He left His Father to offer Himself as the complete sacrifice for our sin on the cross. He passed through hell so we will never have to go there. Jesus shows perfect unconditional love as He chooses to forgive us again and again even though we regularly play the unfaithful bride. Jesus shows us perfect incarnational love in a way that surpasses the sexual union. He gives us His body and blood to touch, taste and ingest in His Supper on a regular basis. It unites us in an intimacy that bridges heaven and earth.

When one man and one woman unite in marriage following the model of Jesus and His Bride, they approach the bliss of a perfect relationship. Jesus empowers His forgiven children to live in His kind of love. He commands in John 13:34, “Just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.”

The first part of such love is beheld when both husband and wife sacrifice their own selfish desires for the good of the other. They are willing to die for one another. And, even more difficult, they give up their own life for each other on a daily basis.

The second part of such love is enjoyed over the long haul as both man and wife choose to stick to their marriage vow unconditionally, “till death us do part.” No running away for greener pastures when fire burns across the meadow. Instead, there is the eager anticipation of new life sprouting from the ashes. The final part of such love is manifest when a husband and wife care for each other incarnationally in every aspect of that word. They touch, eat, sleep, intimately unite as one, care in times of illness, kneel at the Lord’s Table and grow in a oneness of flesh that only Christ can give. As a couple grows in showing these three parts of love taught by Jesus, they grow in a deep joy that the world cannot give. They catch a beautiful glimpse of Jesus and heaven in each other.

Continue reading more about God’s design for one-man, one-woman marriage here.

 

Be Informed
The Guttmacher Institute, which exists to help women find places across the country that offer abortions, is calling for less reporting on abortion data. Convenient for them! Dr. Michael New of the Charlotte Lozier Institute explains why this is a dangerous idea.

 

Be Equipped
Fatherlessness is one of the most important, although ignored, social issues of our time. Learn why fathers play a huge role in the well-being of their families, and particularly in the lives of their daughters.

 

Be Encouraged
“Commit to seeking opportunities to be a light to those living in darkness. Do not place that responsibility on the full-time leaders of the Church. This is your mission in life. God has uniquely placed you in the exact situations, locations, and relationships to make the Light of the world visible and concrete. You are the look of Christ’s face. You are the tone of His voice. You are the touch of His hands. You are the physical representation of His light in a dark world (Ephesians 5:8).” –Paul David Tripp

See Also
Religious Liberty and Bearing the Cross: It’s Always to Share the Message of the Cross
Religious Liberty and Bearing the Cross: It’s Always to Share the Message of the Cross

A blessed Good Friday, Easter morning to you all!!

One of my favorite recurring guests on the “Liberty Action Alert” is Cal Thomas. He is a clear-thinking, fearlessly-engaging, Christian voice in the public square. His columns and commentary always give “public” Christians a lot to think about as they try to live out their faith lives in the particular vocations in the world in which they serve. He wrote this Good Friday piece about 3 years ago,

Sacrificial, Unconditional, Incarnational: A Biblical View of Marriage
Sacrificial, Unconditional, Incarnational: A Biblical View of Marriage

I recently began a wedding sermon addressing the couple, “Your marriage is going to be tough! It’s going to be filled with conflict and suffering and sorrow and pain. And, if you do it right, you’ll eventually get to watch each other get old, have more pain, carry more grief and watch each other move toward death.”

Their eyes got as big as saucers, and their huge smiles started to waver. I paused for a bit with a very serious look on my face, because it is all, sadly, true. I then continued, “However, you’re about to enter one of the most beautiful experiences you can ever have on earth. You’ll have glimpses of heaven that most will never see. You’ll delight in the love of Jesus overflowing to you from your spouse. When you fall, you’ll have each other to speak words of forgiveness and renewal. Your joy will grow and overflow to everyone. And I can say this with certainty.”

The Common Order of Christian Love
The Common Order of Christian Love

According to Luther’s teachings about the Christian life, the good works God desires of us are carried out in our vocations. That is to say, the Christian life does not necessarily involve heroic accomplishments and dramatic deeds. Rather, God calls us to love and serve our neighbors in our ordinary interactions with the members of our families, our coworkers and our fellow citizens.

Making the Case for Life
Making the Case for Life

It’s easy to talk about your pro-life beliefs with your Christian friends. You’re all coming from the same source: the Bible. But what happens when you chat with friends or teachers who aren’t Christian, who don’t see the Bible as anything at all? How can you stand up for life in a pro-choice world?

Don't Be Political
Don't Be Political

Don't speak against abortion, though it will undermine everything you say about the sanctity of life and the Incarnation, our Lord who made His life in the womb. Oh, and babies will be killed. Don't be political and speak the truth of marriage, though God gave it for the sake of all children, so that they might have a mom and dad. Whatever you do, don't get into the whole male and female debate. Let the confused kids fend for themselves. Don't go out of your way, like some Good Samaritan to help them. Don't stand in the way of the predator wielding the knife.

Being for the Family
Being for the Family

“What is marriage?” It seems like a silly question. But it’s one our society is vigorously fighting about. For thousands of years, and for all of recorded history prior to the year 2000, societies around the world recognized that marriage was an exclusive relationship of faithful permanence between one man and one woman, who vowed to remain together until death parts them.

However, in a matter of a few short years (in the scope of human history), the institution of marriage has gone from being exclusively defined between one man and one woman, to being debated by society (it’s now at the highest court in our land), to consider if it might also be applicable to two homosexual men or two homosexual women.

Trust Not In Princes
Trust Not In Princes

“Trust not in princes?” Of course not. But be politically active to defend the unborn, remembering that the aborted child will never be baptized. Trust not in princes, though we don't really have princes, because the Constitution is what governs us. Trust not in princes, but elect the kind of people bold enough to ban males from the sports of females. Trust not in princes, but rejoice when our national laws are in congruence with the higher law. Trust not in firefighters, police officers, or soldiers, but work to create a system where they do their duty for the sake of the common good. Trust not in doctors, but find a good one.

THE GOD OF CREATION
THE GOD OF CREATION

The order for Confession and Absolution often begins with these words: “Our help is in the name of the Lord who made heaven and earth.” It is a plea lifted from Psalm 124. But it prompts some questions. Why are we invoking help from God as Creator rather than as Savior? Why not plead for spiritual deliverance? Why are we looking for help from the God of creation?

Two Threads, One Blessing: A Tale of Harmony and Salvation
Two Threads, One Blessing: A Tale of Harmony and Salvation

Jesus said a very interesting thing in Luke 20:25, “Render unto Caesar the things that are Caesar’s and to God the things that are Gods.” And later to Pontus Pilate, the governor of Judea, who claimed that he had authority over Jesus himself, Jesus responded, “You would have no authority over me at all unless it had been given you from above” (John 19:11). Wow! God is at work. He saves the world through the person and work of Jesus; that’s the main message of the Bible.

A Strange World
A Strange World

We live in a very strange world. It is world that says men and women are the same. In fact, they are so much the same, that a man can decide he is a woman, or a woman can decide she is a man, and everyone around that individual is supposed to act like this is just the way things are. It is asserted that men and women are completely interchangeable, and so marriage can occur between a man and a woman or between two men or between two women.

2025 TO DO LIST
2025 TO DO LIST

What might we, as a people, wish to accomplish in the coming year? Most of it has to do with gaining our voice, and then putting our words into action. That means cultivating courage.

First, we should deal with a constellation of issues revolving around gender. Of course, men should not be allowed to participate in women's sports. Speak up, boycott, act like you mean it. Likewise, let us keep males out of the public bathrooms of women. Protest. Let them know you care about your daughters. Along with that we must begin once again to speak the truth and to reclaim the language. Do not call Rachel Levine a woman, for he is not. Mock those who cannot answer the question, "What is a woman?" And, for heaven's sake, never speak of gender affirming care. Call out such surgery for the barbarism that it is, resulting in irreversible damage, bodily mutilation, a lifetime of misery. Make such treatment illegal everywhere. Instead, help our young people become comfortable in their own bodies.

Fight the Good Fight
Fight the Good Fight

 

We are told to be at peace, for Jesus is Lord. I get that. But don't let it be the kind of peace that serves as a sedative, the kind of peace that puts you to sleep while it is still day, and there is work to do. Christ remains on the throne, but that fact should stir us all the more to do good, and that means, on a day like today, in the political arena. The fact that Jesus is King should not lead us to complacency, but to the boldness that our Lord has our backs, now and into eternity. Knowing that our future is secure, here and now we defend our neighbor, including our littlest neighbor in the womb.

Christian Families Can’t Save the World, but They Can Confess the Faith
Christian Families Can’t Save the World, but They Can Confess the Faith

On my bookshelf is a picture book from 1980 that tells children how babies come into being. The text says, “Since a family is happier with children, your mother and father wanted a baby. They wanted you … to love and to care for.” Thirty years ago, it was normal to assume that getting married and having children made life better. 

Creation and the Foundation of Marriage
Creation and the Foundation of Marriage

“Bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh,” the man exclaimed, “she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man” (Gen. 2:23). God had put the man to sleep, made the woman from his rib and presented her to the man (Gen. 2:21–22). The man’s response expresses the profundity and joy that he had discovered in her sameness; he is also clearly filled with relief. In her, he found rest and a true fulfillment of his godly desire (sexual, emotional, intellectual).

Pro-Death Penalty, Pro-Life
Pro-Death Penalty, Pro-Life

The Lord says, "Whoever sheds the blood of man, by man shall his blood be shed; for in the image of God has God made man" (Genesis 9:6). Speaking of earthly rulers, St. Paul writes, "But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword in vain. For he is the servant of God, an avenger who carries out God's wrath on the wrongdoer" (Romans 13:4). So it is, a functioning society must impose penalties upon criminals. A man may serve ten or twenty years for armed robbery or rape. Circumstances matter, so sentencing varies. Prisons are said to be reformatories, especially when it comes to youth who may not have understood the ramifications of their actions. Prisons do well to incorporate rehabilitation to reduce recidivism. But time in jail is more than a time-out, and a reformed person cannot reverse the consequences of harmful deeds, and for that there is justice.

What Did You Go Out to See?
What Did You Go Out to See?

A reed shaken by the wind? What do you seek in a church? The Roman Catholics, back in 1940s, endorsed the higher critical method (Divino Afflante Spiritu), which allows for Scripture not to mean what it means, just like liberal Protestantism. Perhaps it's not so strange to think a little yeast can leaven many a lump. To what then is the church moored? Tradition is not enough, unless, of course, you think the truth is so pliable as to be reinterpreted for each successive generation. Unless, like the once great biblical scholar Richard Hayes, you can now endorse gay marriage under the umbrella of "the widening of God's mercy."

Christian Citizenship
Christian Citizenship

Let not one say that this “cannot be the purpose of the Church.” We know that it is not the purpose of the Church to influence culture. The Church is distinct in origin and purpose from the civilization in which we live and of which we are a part. The question is whether Christians as citizens shall bear an equal share with the rest of the population in fashioning the character of the American community. The question is whether we shall leave, for instance, the avenues of the daily press, the policies by which journalism is governed, to men of no spiritual understanding, of nothing but material interests, of nothing but carnal ambitions, governed by desire for praise and the love of power, more dangerous than a wild beast, more destructive than a pestilence, if imbued with an atheistic or communistic attitude; or whether the Christian, the Lutheran, shall use the potent influence of journalism to mold and guide public opinion.

The Gift He Was; The Gift He Is
The Gift He Was; The Gift He Is

A blessed Christmas to all of you next Tuesday!  For “on that Day (many years ago) in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ, the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger (Luke 2:11-12).” The life, death, and resurrection of Jesus came as a blessing to the world even though the world didn’t deserve it and even worse, was unreceptive to receiving Him as the gift that He was for them (see John 1:10-13). Increasingly, the world in which we live today seems very unreceptive to that same Gospel, a message that has been such a blessing to the world for over two millennia. Instead of receiving the good news of Jesus like Mary and Joseph, the wisemen, or the shepherds, the world in which we live is violently suspicious of the message of the Messiah like Herod in Matthew 2. In a speech several years ago, Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito warned our nation:

On ‘The Last Battle’: Hope in an Age of Political Woe
On ‘The Last Battle’: Hope in an Age of Political Woe

A charlatan sits in power. Division and cynicism have won the hearts of the people. Foes at home and abroad are cunning. The nation feels sullied. Such is the situation facing Tirian, the last king of Narnia.

In C.S. Lewis’s The Last Battle, the beloved land of the famed children’s series is under attack.  Narnia’s enemies, the Calormenes, have taken over the country. Through treachery, they have fooled loyal Narnians into believing that Aslan — Narnia’s Christ figure — is on their side. Fear and confusion prevent Narnians from coming to Tirian’s aid.

On the Election
On the Election

As citizens of this great nation, we use our God-given reason to elect men and women who we believe will most closely rule according to God’s will and Word. But we also know that the U.S. has maintained a perfect record of electing sinners to be presidents and senators and representatives: every single one of them.

As citizens of this great nation, we use our God-given reason to elect men and women who we believe will most closely rule according to God’s will and Word. But we also know that the U.S. has maintained a perfect record of electing sinners to be presidents and senators and representatives: every single one of them.

Getting Involved
Getting Involved

Is it alright for Christians to be involved with politics?

The Bible contains no specific command that either requires or forbids Christian involvement with politics. However, through the prophet Jeremiah, God teaches His people that they should, “Seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you into exile, and pray to the Lord on its behalf” (Jer. 29:57). In other places, God teaches that Christians should obey and pray for those in positions of civil authority (Matt. 22:21; Rom. 13:17; Titus 3:1; 1 Pet. 2:13). These passages, together with the general biblical teaching that Christians should care for and promote the welfare of their neighbor, would suggest that Christians should participate in the process of deciding how we, as a nation, shall live.

Abortion Is a Biblical/Political Issue
Abortion Is a Biblical/Political Issue

Soft people in the church, those who are double minded and wish to run from the truth, will tell pastors not to preach about abortion. The disconnect is real, surely in the LCMS too. These folks will tell pastors not to bring political issues into the pulpit, and far too many otherwise faithful pastors comply. But, of course, as a popular meme says, abortion is distinctly a biblical issue.

Facts, Fiction, and the Media: Reading and Watching the News as a Lutheran
Facts, Fiction, and the Media: Reading and Watching the News as a Lutheran

As Christians, we live as strangers even in our own land. We live in a tension between being a Christian and an American. Our aims and the country’s aims will sometimes diverge. But God also calls us to work for the good of our neighbors, as far as we are able. In America, where citizens participate in the task of bringing about just government, Christians have a vocation to participate in the political life of the nation.

Jack Phillips
Jack Phillips

This morning I sip coffee from one of his mugs: "Masterpiece Cakeshop: Yeah . . . that cakeshop." What cakeshop? If you don't know, you're not informed, and you're watching the wrong news. Jack has been embroiled in legal battles since 2012, when the baker declined to use his talents to create a custom cake celebrating a so-called gay marriage. Phillips, mind you, served all people, no matter what. But he did not wish to use his time and talents to commemorate that which he believed was wrong. This is what the First Amendment is all about, freedom of speech, which means the freedom from compelled speech, along with the free exercise of religion.

TIME TO VOTE – SO EXERCISE YOUR GOD-GIVEN RESPONSIBILTY
TIME TO VOTE – SO EXERCISE YOUR GOD-GIVEN RESPONSIBILTY

What do these things have in common and why does it matter for us this election? The “Sinicization movement” in China towards religion, the Bishop Johanna Pohjola trial in Finland, and the so-called “Respect for Marriage Act” law in America? All these are examples of a growing, secular statism growing abroad and now—here. When people ask me, “For whom or for what should I vote this election?” Amidst all the rhetoric and rancor, my main advice is that you vote for the platform that limits government’s coercive power, and the platform that more clearly defines a more limited role of government in the lives of ALL Americans.

GUIDELINES FOR YOUR VOTE – VOTE PRINCIPLES, PLATFORMS, NOT PEOPLE
GUIDELINES FOR YOUR VOTE – VOTE PRINCIPLES, PLATFORMS, NOT PEOPLE

Is it alright for Christians to be involved with politics?

The Bible contains no specific command that either requires or forbids Christian involvement with politics. However, through the prophet Jeremiah, God teaches His people that they should, “Seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you into exile, and pray to the Lord on its behalf” (Jer. 29:57). In other places, God teaches that Christians should obey and pray for those in positions of civil authority (Matt. 22:21; Rom. 13:17; Titus 3:1; 1 Pet. 2:13).

Reformation Reflections about Liberty and Freedom: They Still Matter!
Reformation Reflections about Liberty and Freedom: They Still Matter!

Every year on October 31, Christians from around the world are reminded of a “reforming” movement that brought back to light the central message of the Bible, the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  Freedom, life, and salvation were again heard as God’s gifts offered to sinners by grace alone, through faith alone, in the person and work of Jesus Christ alone. Martin Luther’s rediscovery of the uniqueness of the freedom of the Gospel as God’s saving work in the world for all shook the foundations of the medieval world. It ushered in many of the precious freedoms that we enjoy in this world today. It clearly identified and distinguished the uniqueness of the eternal freedom that comes from knowing and trusting in God’s gracious work in Jesus from the cultural/political freedoms that come from public policy, citizenship, and good government. Distinguishing, cherishing, and engaging both freedoms is part of what it means to be a Christian citizen in the world for the sake of the culture and the mission of the Church.

Abortion Exceptions
Abortion Exceptions

Former President Donald Trump has come out in favor of the rape and incest exception [with regard to abortion], and that's a pity. And yet a friend says we need to have abortion precisely because some women are raped or are victims of incest. What that shows is that people are not listening or are confused by the propaganda press, which is the only press half the country ever gets.

Beyond the Booth
Beyond the Booth

One of the cherished notions that typically guides the lives of Americans is that politics and religion do not mix. Of course, there are some areas of overlap that Americans accept and even expect, like a prayer at a presidential inauguration or candidates ending speeches with “God bless America.” But, on the whole, it is taken for granted that there needs to be a clear distinction or even a wall of separation between church and state. People do not want the government telling them what to believe about God, and they do not want the church telling them how to vote. Actually, they do not want anyone telling them how to vote.

How Can You Call Yourself Pro-Life
How Can You Call Yourself Pro-Life

How can you call yourself pro-life and not support free lunches, open borders, socialized healthcare? Well, you fill in the blank. First, off, such talk is a diversionary tactic, disingenuous. Can we simply agree that we ought not to be killing babies, whether they are in the womb or have been born? It really is that simple.

LCRL Staff
Previous

WHAT THE WORLD NEEDS NOW – CHRIST’S “SPIRITUAL FIRST RESPONDERS!”
Next

THINGS AREN’T ALWAYS AS THEY SEEM!